A reader suggested that in light of this Roger Clemens trial that there should be a video game where the baseball players are juiced. Totally agree ...
In light of that, here are some suggestions for sports video games that designers can have on the store shelves for the day after Thanksgiving.
1. NFL 2011 - Labor Wars
In this video game the player can either be the union chief DeMaurice Smith or NFL boss Roger Goodell as you hammer out a collective bargaining agreement.
As Goodell, you win by breaking the union while juggling people like Dan Snyder, Jerry Jones against Mike Brown, Jim Irsay and others. The wild card is whether or not you can even understand Al Davis; if you can correctly guess what Davis says during an owner's meeting, it's worth triple the points.
As Smith, you win by getting a 50/50 split, not missing any games, and by keeping your job.
There is an old-school version of this game where Pete Rozelle has Gene Upshaw run errands for him where you get points based on how many things Upshaw can complete while receiving minimal compensation.
2. MLB 2012 - Roid Rage
Pretty basic setup for this game; all of the players are juiced. When a player is in a down cycle his production will drop, so when you set up the lineup it will be very important to balance the order according to the player's steroid cycle.
Players will be more prone to injury, and the designers can increase a player's back hair, forehead growth and head hair loss as the season prolongs.
As the team's owner, you will have to account for not only player salaries, but how much to invest in steroids.
3. Tiger Woods PGA Golf 2012 - Score
This is self explanatory, but as the PGAer not only does your score count, but also whether or not you "scored". Just as the Masters is worth more than Valero, points will be awarded as well on the other side. Waitresses are worth one or two points, etc.
4. Dale Jr's NASCAR 2012 - Gett'n Paid
The goal of this game is not to win a single race, or place in the top 10, but make as much money as possible by accomplishing very little. Points are taken away the higher you finish, but it's a delicate balance. You must remain on the track and give the appearance of competing in every race, and mollifying your sponsors.
5. Cecil Newton NCAA Football 2011 - Leverage
In this game you are the parent and you use your athlete son for personal gain. This one is tricky. Your son must be good so you control how well, or poorly, he plays in games. Then you must balance negotiating your son between big time power schools, but remain mostly invisible. You win if your son is the No. 1 overall pick in the NFL draft. You lose if earns his college degree.
6. FIFA World Cup Soccer 2012 - Bribery
In this game there is no actual soccer played. It's your job to open the World Cup to bidding international cities, and brazenly screw them in an effort to get as much money for your own personal bank account. But you separate yourself from other FIFA voters you must secure your child's education at a prestigious private school, vacations and side action. You only lose if your FIFA voting membership is stripped, but really, in a game like this, there are no losers.
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