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Movie review: A little girl drops the hammer on The Croods

215px-The_Croods_posterParents should disregard any film review written by an adult about movies for kids. No parent cares about the cinematic quality of the kid flick; the aim is two hours of a decent, climate-controlled distraction that will put the parent towards the ultimate goal - bed time.

Anything else - plot, messages, story line, personal enjoyment - is a lottery.

Dreamworks latest creation, The Croods, achieves the bare minimum with lots of cute animals, pretty colors and other distractable scenes.

Alas, it also is a colossal failure - my daughter cried twice during the movie, and had a hard time sleeping as a result. There are a few explosions during the movie, as well as a menacing saber-toothed cat who doesn't turn out to be nice until the end.

This is her review.

The Big Mac Blog: Did you like the movie The Croods?
Vivian: No.

The Big Mac Blog: Why did not you like that movie?
Vivian: Because. I didn't ... want to go ... to that movie.

The Big Mac Blog: Did the movie scare you?
Vivian: Uh-huh.

The Big Mac Blog: What parts scared you?
Vivian: The scary things.

The Big Mac Blog: Do you want to see it again?
Vivian: No.

The Big Mac Blog: What movie do you want to see?
Vivian: A different one.

As you can see, this is a giant thumbs down from a 4-year-old.

Parents - go at your own risk. 

Twitter @MacEngelProf

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miss ellie

That kid has a lot of insight, a quick wit, and some interesting opinions. See if you get her to do a review of 'Olympus Has Fallen.' I'm a big Gerald Butler fan but have been skeptical of some of his choices lately. Also if she can review anything with cats in it, that would be good too. I love cat movies.

nic cage

Her review is spot on. Its high brow enough that you could easily convince me that is was done by a 5 year old.


Loved the movie. Wouldn't take a 4 year old though, as some of the scenes would probably be scary to a 4 year old. Hence the PG rating. Stick to G.

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